Because of the attack on the U.S. Capital last week, five people died and there have been several arrests because, surprisingly, attacking the Capitol, carrying weapons, and shouting about how you’re going to “hang” the VICE-PRESIDENT, will get you arrested. Did you know? Some people are surprised. No one is more surprised than Chuck Norris, however, who had to clear up some things and say he was not present at the siege. But you know who was? Gold medal-winning Olympic swimmer, Klete Keller. Welp, looks like Ryan Lochte isn’t the only dum-dum of the 2016 Olympics swimming team.
After a picture came out of a Chuck Norris-looking man at the Capitol Insurrection, the rumor was passed that Chuck Norris was part of the siege on the Capitol, which wasn’t a total stretch since he endorsed Trump in 2016. But 80-year-old Chuck Norris swears that he was not there and that it was some look-a-like loser. Chuck’s rep explained that the man could not be Chuck Norris since the real Chuck Norris is way hotter:
Lolol Chuck Norris’ manager’s statement to the Beast: “This is not Chuck Norris and is a wanna be look alike although Chuck is much more handsome. Chuck remains on his range in Texas where he has been with his family.” https://t.co/bU1E4qaqiy
— Kevin Fallon (@kpfallon) January 12, 2021
Meanwhile, 38-year-old swimmer, Klete Keller is probably wishing he had a doppelganger because he’s been exposed! Klete won two gold medals as part of Michael Phelps‘ relay team, and slick detectives were able to ID him at the coup attempt because the 6-foot-6 man wore his American Olympic swim team jacket. So inconspicuous! A giant in a jacket only a handful of people on Earth have? Perfect disguise! Why not just slap on a nametag with an address?
The Hill says that “at least a dozen people in the swimming community” recognized Klete. He deleted his social media (too late, boo) but his posts were all very pro-Trump. And it looks like he got dropped from the real estate agency he was working for:
Keller had most recently worked as a real estate agent in Colorado Springs with the agency Hoff & Leigh. While the company initially confirmed Keller’s employment to SwimSwam, Hoff & Leigh had removed Keller’s profile from its website by Monday night.
The internet did not take its foot off Klete’s face, people have been exposing him hard and calling for him to be stripped of his medals. They even got to his Wiki page!
— Cgsg52008 (@cgsg52008) January 12, 2021
— Kiro (@kirosuto) January 12, 2021
Klete and imitation Chuck Norris are so stupid. An insurrection rarely has the intended effect. And of course, the real Chuck Norris wasn’t there. First of all, when Chuck Norris does a coup he goes alone. And these guys had to break windows and shit to get inside. Chuck Norris could break down a wall with the fist hidden under his beard.